Makeup Monday: Goldfish

Today I felt inspired by the lovely goldfish. I had a goldfish when I was a kid. I named him Aragorn.

Needless to say, the Lord of the Rings ended very differently in our household, and not nearly as well.




All the pretty eyeshadows are Lunatick AlieNEON pigments. The painted purple and orange stripes near the eyebrows and cheekbones are Mehron, and the gold scale paint is Kryolan Aquacolor in bronze. Lips are Mehron and glitter.









That is all! Avast, ye scurvy fishies!


Makeup Monday: Peeps!

You would think I’d have done a St. Patrick’s Day look today, but no, despite having an Irish husband, I completely forgot the day was coming. Also, when you grow up in a college town, the things you associate with St. Patrick’s Day are not typically things you WANT to inspire makeup looks… Green puke! Screaming sorority girls! Passed out dudes in cheap plastic beads and vulgar t-shirts! How inspiring!

So none of that for me. You may pinch me if you want.

Today’s face is a bit tamer– I had towear it to work at the restaurant and be the hostess with the mostess. I will admit I have a bit of shame about this; I had a moment of “go big or go home!” but I already get a lot of odd comments at work, plus I wouldn’t want to put patrons off their food, so I went for “wearable daily look”. Sort of.

 I recently lightened my roots and removed more of the pink from my hair, which I think, what with my fried, fluffy locks (remember when I did that? Yeah, it’s still a thing) makes me look a bit like a baby chick, which made me think Easter, which made me think PEEPS.


Peeps are one of those cultural staples that are practically REQUIRED for Easter to happen. Welcoming of Spring? What? No, welcoming of marshmallow birds and chocolate eggs laid by dubious rabbits! Ok I talk shit, but I do love Easter. Anyway, Peeps.


So lots of yellow and glitter, OBVIOUSLY. Sadly, the glitter didn’t show up very well in the photos, which is too bad, as I promise you my eyes looked like sugar-coated diabetes-in-waiting.






I used a combination of Mehron and Lunatick Labs for the yellows and oranges, with touches of Urban Decay on the top. The eyeliner is Wet ‘n’ Wild and is, in point of fact, brown to mimic the Peeps’ chocolate eyes, but you can’t really tell in the photos. Ah well.

Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have some green cupcakes to make, because not everyone forgot it was St. Patrick’s Day.


Makeup Monday: Away Message

It’s Jason’s birthday today and we are taking a few days away, so no new face today. Instead I present you with a few blasts from the past. I hope you enjoy them despite the terrible snapshot quality.

That time I was rocker Alice…


And went to a party that got photographed and ended up being the example picture for Wikipedia’s definition of “shag hairstyle”... in a cheap wig that is really not a shag cut at all. Irony lurks around every corner…

The time I was some sort of doll:


And had a dance with a dapper Egyptian god. IMGP3119

Or the time Jason and I were animals:



And the day we were, collectively, Bowie:


And the time we were Johnny Depp:


Ok I hope you enjoyed my little memory-lane ramble.  Have a splendid week.



Makeup Monday: 80’s Neon Punk, aka billybowiefrank.

Am I over my neon kick yet? Bitches, I am just getting started! I have all the markers and I won’t give them up! Nor shall I color within the lines! Rebellion!

I wasn’t feeling particularly inspired today, and my eyes are all puffy because apparently spring is here and brought me some allergies as a present. I didn’t notice this until I thought “maybe I’ll try a real cut crease look today” and then realized that the entire part of my lid I’d drawn on had been absorbed into the rest of the puffy flesh of my eye. Thus ensued a good 5 minutes of moving my chin up and down in the mirror and being hypnotically disturbed by watching my eyelids disappear within themselves. Yep, I am gross, it is true.

That was disheartening.

So to make myself feel better I pulled out my trusty Lunatick Labs AlieNEON palette, which is guaranteed to restore hope and faith in the goodness of the world by it’s sheer manic COLORFULNESS.

IMG_1881Seriously, how can you look at this and not feel better? It’s like pigment prozac.

So I started slapping green on my face, because I’ve been on a pink kick recently and I should try something new already.  This quickly turned into a bit of an 80’s party of punky proportions. Man, 80’s makeup kind of rules. You may see a lot more in this vein until I get over it and spiral into greyscale or something.  Ok, so for lack of a better term, this is my David-Bowie-Billy-Idol-and-Lisa-Frank-love-child (what a hot mess!) look:


For those of you who are curious, I used Lunatick’s white primer on my lids and brow area. The colors are pretty much all from the AlieNeon palette, with Urban Decay blue and purple swept over the inner and outer eyes for a little shimmer. Eyeliner is Wet-n-Wild liquid and Urban Decay pencil. False lashes would have been a good move but I am lazy and suck at applying them so too damn bad. Lips are Kryolan Aquacolor and Lunatick Labs Dr. Jekyll.

Here’s my Billy Idol moment. It’s a nice day for a neon wedding!



Oh, but David Bowie makes a comeback! Ground control to Major Neon!


And then Lisa is like “don’t forget me and my friends the rainbow dolphins and panda bears!”


And then Debbie Harry showed up and ruined everything. 6

80’s color-punk forever!





So that was my day. How was yours?






Makeup, New Stuff

Makeup Thursday! (doesn’t really have the same ring, does it?)

Due to some personal schedule changes, I have moved makeup day to Thursday. Which means all(iteration) is lost.


Alright I’ll stop.

In other news, we released the ONCE AND FUTURE HOODIE today. This is the newest addition to the IA Jacket line, and it’s  PURPLE (of course. Because it’s freaking royal!)  These took me nigh unto forever to design, and they are pretty wonderful, I have to say. So you should all go buy one, and then we can rumble across the plains together as a giant, sparkly stampede of glory.

In honor of this momentous event, today’s makeup is from the last Incandescent Armor photoshoot, the theme of which was (surprise) unicorns, rainbows, glitter and rocking out. It is shocking, I know.







Avast, ye scurvy dogs!




Makeup Monday: Purple Pony


My Little Pony, My Little Pony…. who knows the song? No, not the current version, friendship is freaking magical or what have you. Yes, it’s the hour of crotchety “PONIES WERE BETTER IN MY DAY” grumbling. Hey, I’m 32 now, I’m entitled. And get off my lawn while you’re at it.

No, no, I don’t mean to hate. I’m glad ponies have been revived (because PONIES!) but I don’t like the new look. It’s this current trend of bigger eyes=moar cuter… where does it end, people? Let’s look at the evolution of the pony, shall we?


Generation 1! This is Applejack, circa 1982 (the year of my birth. Coincidence? I think not.)


Generation 2; Late 90’s. Nobody remembers these, according to the internet. They didn’t do well. Sad pony.


Generation 3! This is Applejack with a makeover, circa 2003ish. I like this generation, I have to say.


Egads! Applejack, what did they DO to you?! Generation 4, 2011 ish

The next generation can be called My Little Eyeballs.

Anyway, ranting aside, I loves me some My Little Pony. There was a terrible MLP movie that came out in the 80’s sometime featuring some nasty-pasty witch ladies who wanted to take over Ponyland so they created this horrible living purple slime monster called the Smooze. There’s a catchy little musical interlude in which they sail on waves of Smooze in their cauldron singing “Nothing can stop the Smooze” (spoiler alert: flutter ponies can stop the Smooze. Darn.)

SO. I was thinking ponies and smooze and here’s some makeup about that.

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Friends, Makeup

Makeup Monday (On a Tuesday): Happy Gothday to Me.

Makeup Monday has become Tardy Tuesday. Why? Because Monday was my birthday and I got to do what I want. Which included throwing a Gothday party for my inner teenager and I was too busy moping about dramatically to post pictures. So there. But now I have pictures of my birthday goth face AND bonus pictures of some other dramatic souls. I went a bit softer for this look; historically when I go goth I go all out– lots and lots of black–but then I see pictures of me and GAH! I think it makes my face too heavy, so I tried something with a bit more color. I know, heresy, but it’s red and purple so it’s ok.

I was a legit goth for a while in highschool; my parents actually bought me a dog-tag with my name on it for my spiked collar– they thought they were quite funny, I imagine. I, of course, huffed a lot about how they just didn’t GET IT.

Here are a few bits of evidence. I’m sure there’s more somewhere but let’s leave that to history. Note the dramatic black-and-white film, artsy double exposure, and gothy band posters. Yes, that was my room. I also covered the ceiling with tin foil– what of it?

goth1 goth2

So what was it about being a goth? There’s something about being a teenager that is just perfect for the goth lifestyle. A sense of awkward uncertainty, coupled with massive self-centeredness and a grand flair for the dramatic. The boots, fishnets and trench coats made pretty fantastic armor; I always felt like such a badass lacing up my 20-hole boots (Fluevog Angels, if you were wondering).

Except I was kind of scared of everyone.

But dressing goth gave you an instant crew– all the other goth kids. I don’t actually recall even LIKING most of them that much, but we all needed protection, so we were bound together. My mother once asked me why, if I hated the “look at the weird kid” attention that my looks got me, why didn’t I just dress in a normal, inconspicuous way? Why did I “ask for it” if I didn’t want it? I didn’t have a good answer then, and I still don’t, though I no longer get mad and storm off about it. It would have been easier to just put on jeans and a t-shirt and blend in and be left alone… all I can say is that I tried that in freshman year and girls on the volleyball team were still monumentally mean and exclusive, so I basically said “fuck it” and went in the extreme opposite direction. If you’re not going to like or include me when I try to look like Suzie Highschool, then I’m going to become the opposite of that, and if that makes you uncomfortable, good. Fuck you and your popularity.

I never said it was particularly solid logic.

I wish I had my freshman and sophomore highschool pictures around. I have the exact same haircut in both, but in the first I’m blonde and wide-eyed in a white shirt; in the second the hair, lips, eyes and shirt are black and I’m smirking nastily. My dad used to keep them together in his wallet and call them “his two daughters”. Ha ha, Dad.

So many experiences as a teenager are firsts and thus monumental; just driving with friends feels like a music video. I cannot remember a time, before or since, that I ever enjoyed being in a car so much; the sense of freedom and inexpressible coolness it conveyed. Driving to the mall to go to Hot Topic was a joyous event worthy of folklore. Sitting at a coffee shop and drinking chai was an entire lifestyle. Playing pool at a bar that allowed high schoolers in until 6 was akin to being a god.  Even depression is a novelty; I really reveled in being sad– dare I say I enjoyed it? Can you still be depressed if you are loving it? I recall having such a grand sense of my own epic importance and infinite possibility– I felt like something huge just waiting to happen, tense and taut with expectation.

I don’t want to romanticize high school– it was socially and emotionally rough and I don’t miss it– but I did enjoy that period in my life. In a chaotic, romantic, seethingly emotional way, it was truly grand, and I would like to retain some of that sense of excitement and possibility, rather than slipping into a jaded, bored stagnation. To still be so excited about what we are becoming, rather than lamenting what we have lost or have not lived up to. So here’s to goths everywhere– I raise a glass of blood-red wine, light a clove cigarette, bow deeply and say… nice boots.


I actually smoked this whole clove in my photo-closet while taking these. It was a birthday present and tasted like teenagers. Now all my clothes smell funny and my mom is going to ask about it and I’m going to catch hell. Oh wait I’m a grown up now.
3_3 3_9 3_5 3_43_7

Super-Goth Glamour Shots. My orange nails totally ruin everything.


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And a close-up of my eyes. Now I’m thinking I should have shaved my eyebrows and drawn them back on but I wasn’t quite ready for that level of commitment.

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And some party pictures. Goths don’t party, they convene and are alone together.


Hooray. Totally.


His ring is a bird skull that flips open to hold pills or poison and his necklace is bullets. Dreammmmmbooooooat!8

Look at this spooky bitch.

Goths don’t wash dishes, they just scowl at them until they’re clean.6

Prince of Darkness!5 4

I have no idea what’s going on here but it’s kind of awesome.


It’s my party and I’ll die if I want to!

Skull kissy-face.


Bad wigs a-go-go.


Pretty Jen.

We stole these from graves… just kidding it was Michael’s.roses

Ok that’s all. Have a spooky Tuesday.